20050713

That's No Moon

ARGH! My stupid computer!

Sigh. "Recover post", it does nothing!

So, I lost everything I wrote. As if my day hasn't been bad enough already. Typical.

Anyway, I've been away for a while. Let me explain:

...

No, there's too much. Let me sum up:

We got to Alderaan, except...no Alderaan! It wasn't there. It'd been
totally blown away. We chased a fighter to a small moon, only it was no moon, it was a space station! Bigger than any I'd ever seen.

We got tractored aboard, and had to hide in the, uh, special compartments I have. Anyway... After "borrowing" some stormtrooper armor, we made our way on to the station.

The fossil said he was going to go shut down the tractor beam, and took off. Chewie said "The old man's gone mad." Yeah, no kidding.

While we were waiting, R2 (with his 1337 m4d |-|4><0r skills) found a rich princess, so we decided to save money. Er, her. We decided to save her money.

Farmboy came up with what was possibly the dumbest rescue plan ever, but I couldn't think of a better one, so off we went. Result: A massive shootout ending with us locked in a compressing trash compactor. Wonderful. We only got out thanks to that R2 (whom I'm loving more and more).

The princess immediately tried to take over. You know how bureaucrats are. Like I'm going to take advice from someone who ended up in prison. If that's on your resumé, you lose a lot of credibility (if you can't keep YOURSELF out of trouble, how are you going to help me?). Gah! What a controlling bitch! AND she made fun of my ship! It was almost out the ol' airlock for her, right there.

We split up and made our way back to the Falcon. And this is where my day really got bad:

The old man got himself killed. That's right, killed! Can you believe how selfish he was? Talk about taking the easy way out. NOW WHO IS GOING TO PAY ME MY 15,000 CREDITS?

Sigh.

Also, I caught a brief glimpse of Vader. Vader and I...there's a terrible secret I don't think I'm ready to share just yet.

Anyway, now were on our way to the rebel base. Hopefully someone THERE will have my money. Her Worship thinks there's a tracking device hidden on my ship, but we can't find it. So why give away the location of the base?

Here's her reasoning:
  1. R2 has the plans to the space station. We need to go somewhere to avoid capture, and the rebels are most convenient.
  2. Even after the Imperials know the location, it will still take some time for them to plan and execute their assault.
  3. During that time, they can disseminate copies of the plans, so that even if the base is destroyed, the information is still out there.
  4. The rebels might be able to find a weakness in the design fast enough to launch their own offensive, and save the rebel base from destruction (not likely).
Here's my reasoning:
  1. Someone there will have my money, and I can find and remove the tracker (with the proper tools) and leave, long before the Imps arrive.
Blogger flu said...

So...you're just gonna take your reward and you're just leaving then?

Come on! Why don't you take a look around? You know what's about to happen, what they're up against. They could use a good pilot like you. You're turning your back on them.

All Right. Well, take care of yourself, Han. I guess that's what you're best at, isn't it?

7/13/2005 10:56:00 PM  
Blogger Anakin Skywalker said...

You go, homes! Let 'em fend for they own selves. What good's a reward if you ain't around to use it, right? 'Sides, this Vader dude'll probably wipe the floor with those guys - best be outta there, yo.

7/13/2005 11:44:00 PM  
Blogger JawaJuice said...

I dare ya!
Change the course of time...
Take the money and run...
Smack the monkey and go...

7/13/2005 11:51:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I bet you think she's pretty though. C'mon, doncha? And doncha just love powerful women? I know you do!

7/14/2005 01:03:00 AM  
Blogger Captain Typho said...

Her royal highness is right to head for the rebel base. If you tried to lay low with the plans, Vader would surely blow up planet after planet until you came out of hiding.

Besides, it's more fun this way!

7/14/2005 01:01:00 PM  
Blogger Leia said...

You know I'm right, Han.
If money's all you care about, that's what I'll shove up your sorry ...!

7/15/2005 03:37:00 AM  
Blogger Angel of Music said...

Bummer about the the old man... and the girl may be more trouble than she's worth. Get your reward and come visit our lair... no one has ever found us under the opera house. We could PAR-TAE'!

7/16/2005 11:12:00 AM  
Blogger ®2-ð2 said...

|-|4 |-|4! |-|4v3 j00 z33|\| 7|-||z?

(ph®0m http://www.howitshouldhaveended.com/)

7/16/2005 03:33:00 PM  
Blogger Tahl said...

Be careful. You can't trust Artoo droids.

7/17/2005 09:14:00 AM